Losing The Pet I Had My Whole Life - i cant believe the day has finally come =(

BOAW

Jun 16 2006, 06:19 PM

i lost the one true animal(cat: Smokey) that i love today

, this is so hard to deal with and i cant believe its happening. ive had him since 1990 and im 18 right now, i had him for about 16 years. i dont know what or how to think when stuff like this happens, all i can think is negative things be sad and cry. When we took him in i couldnt even watch them put it to sleep so i stepped out, the only person that was there for him was my father so he could keep my cat company in his last few moments. i wish i cudve stayed to be there with him in his last moments but it was just too hard, i didnt want to see the process of him falling into the neverending of unconsciousness. my father never cried, i just dont understand, not even when his parents died. ive never in my life ever seen him cry. i promised myself i wouldnt cry but thats just way to hard, its nearly impossible to make myself do that.

Now that this have happen ive viewed life differently. just thinkn about how every1 will pass one day and theres nothing we can do about it. all the people you loved and lived with will die someday, and one day when that day finally comes, your going to have to experience your loved ones death. everyone goes through it and thats just part of life. in some ways life sux but its worth living.

some people say when you lose a pet of yours a good way to make your feel better is to get yourself a new one. Well i feel whether i get a new one i still wont be satisfied, nothing will ever replace the cat i had my whole life. Some poeple may think the way im acting is ridiculous, that im crying and moping over a cat. Well if there is no sorrow in your life how would you know what love truly is? Today i truly showed how much i loved this cat and no matter what it is, if you love it and cherish it your going to be very sad when you someday lose it. besides would you think getting a new pet would be worth it? becuase one day that pet of yours will someday pass away and youll experience the same stuff over again, and then what are you gunna do? get another? Well i dont think ill be gettn any pet for a LONG TIME.

Mr. T

Jun 16 2006, 06:25 PM

I am sorry to hear that this happened to you. I also just had this happen to me a few months ago I had a dog also for 17 years every since I was just over one years old. She got def about 4 years ago and is very protective to anyone new who came near my house. She has was sick for the last couple years and had a very bad cough everyday.
Losing a close pet you had your whole life is one of the worse things you can go for since it is a member of your family and your closet friend other then humans. You grow up with the dog mostly starting as a pup till over the age the time the pet is suppose to live up till.
So I feel how you do with how close you were to your pet because not many people understand that it is not something to easily get over it is like have a conjoined twin on your head that is how close you really are to your pet.

gameratheart

Jun 16 2006, 06:42 PM

This happened to me recently, too. I used to have a dog named Sandy. We rescued her from a family who was torturing her when I was a toddler, and she's been with us ever since.

About three month ago problems appeared on her, and she eventually was unable to move. I knew then she was soon to die. So a month later I talk to her and say how I was going to miss her.

She died a week later, in her sleep. I was asleep at the time, and was only informed about her death when I woke up at noon. While I was initially upset, I knew I had already said my goodbyes, and I knew it would happen. I was the only one who felt conforted that night.

But I won't get another dog, because I feel it would just remind me of Sandy, and bring me nothing but pain. It hurts, I know.

I am thankful to think that I still have a happy and healthy cat, however. I know she'll stay alive for many more years to come. That is my only comfort now. Unless I find another thing to comfort me, I am absolutely sure that the day my cat dies will be the day I die.

Madkat-Z

Jun 16 2006, 07:06 PM

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. I have gone threw that experiance quite a few times. I've lived with cats all my life and I currently have 7 of them. My cat, Stranger, died year ago and I'd had her for most of my life as well (about 16 years as well). However, I've managed to move on, and we ended up with another cat. I know its you get attached to your cats and I know that there will never be another cat like Stranger in my life, just like there will never be another Smokey in yours, but life goes on and the wounds heal.

Tsunade

Jun 16 2006, 09:01 PM

That's sooooo sad to hear.... you're completely right and your way of thinking is absolutely right! I have a cat, ONLY for 3 years though - and when he ran away a few days ago I was about to cry when I saw his food/sandbow/bed thinking I'd never see him again (and I'm 21) luckily he returned, but I can't imagine what would happen to me and my way of thinking if my cat died and I haven't had him for that long too (compared to your stories and all the long memories you have) - it's just sad reading this post!

And whoever says another pet can cure the wound is a heartless ****

WarFact

Jun 16 2006, 09:41 PM

I have 3 dogs, one of which we've had since I was about 4 I think. He has arthritis and sometimes cannot stand up. He's also overweight, so that doesn't really help. I can sort of understand how you feel, even though I haven't lost him yet. When that day comes, I will be out for a couple days.

Losing a pet is almost just like losing a member of your family. So you have a right to feel the way you feel.

Tetraca

Jun 16 2006, 10:42 PM

I'm sorry to hear that.

. Though the only pets I've lost were some fish, so I can really feel for you, though. It's not really sad when you lose a goldfish since there was little redeeming value for me from having them as a pet.

Mich

Jun 17 2006, 02:20 AM

You have my sympathy , BOAW. You are doing the right thing. Talking about it will help you let go of your pain. I have lost several wonderful pets over the years as well as a couple of horses that I grew to love too much. My last pet, my Siamese cat, was with us over 21 years. I consoled myself by creating a memorial to him on my personal web site. My Memorial Writing or talking about these losses is very theraputic. Perhaps you could write a story about your cat's life and the characteristics that made him so special. I managed to hold my special cat while he departed as I had my poodle a number of years back. It was very difficult, but I felt I had to do it for them.

I also have a page on my personal site about dealing with death; albiet human. That Webpage Being an older person, I have found the need to learn to accept death as it comes. When you lose your parents, it certainly puts you in touch with your mortality. And that isn't any fun.

Zabb

Jun 17 2006, 02:41 AM

QUOTE

my father never cried, i just dont understand, not even when his parents died.

you build a tolerance over the years.

husker

Jun 17 2006, 04:01 AM

It's hard to not cry. It may sound easy, but when the moment comes, you just have to let it out. This is sad to hear though. There's nothing you can really do besides move on. Although you say you won't be getting a pet for a long time, I think you should. It may not seem the same, but you begin to love it and forget about your old cat.

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master_bacarra

Nov 3 2006, 06:59 PM

i understand your situation. it was your pet's time to go and you've said it yourself, it goes to show that every living creature in this world will, at some point, wither and pass away (i'd rather use the phrase than the 'd' word). and it goes to show that not only humans have the 'essence' or soul. i've been deceived all my childhood by people who say that animals, other than humans, do not have souls. but anyway, my point is that it will hurt, and it will take time. mourn, cry if you have to, it will help you more in moving on.

i have a pet dog once, she's not of any special breed... or should i say that she's more of a hybrid dog. ever since she was born, i took care of her. she grew up and had babies which i had no problem raising as well (unfortunately, we had to give them out, since we can't afford to own too many pets at home). when she was about 10 years old or so, she had her last 2 babies, whom we never gave out. i was glad since i could raise two more dogs, dogs that were of the lineage of my great pet. everything was fine until a tragedy struck. all of the sudden my pet got sick. i just thought she wasn't in the mood or was just tired until i realized she couldn't even stand up and eat. moments later, she died. when we were burying her, we noticed that one of her puppies looked tired. i was thinking it was sad because his mother was already dead (or something like that). then we found out a bit later that the puppy was also sick and died the same day. two days later, the last puppy died as well. it was like an epidemic that only attacked the family of my pet. and the experience was so traumatic, since all of them died in just one week.

i think it proves the point that once we get attached to someone (or something like a pet, for that matter), it's hard to let go. and when these things come, the inevitable, we have no choice but to accept it. we just keep in mind that some time in the future, we hope that we would be reunited with them again.

with regards to your father not crying, sometimes (like one person stated) people can build up the tolerance when it comes to these things. and it doesn't make them heartless for not even shedding a tear or something. sometimes a person has to stay strong, whatever and how devastating a situation may be. and this will help those in need of a strong support, for these people need to feel that somehow they can depend on these people to have a shoulder to cry on to. and i may sound sexist for saying this, but society has created this idealogy that men are not supposed to show any sign of weakness. but of course, that was to back up my statement. i'm not saying that when you cry, you're not strong. people can have their own ways of expressing their feelings and emotions. and it's not forbidden for someone to let his/her own emotions. crying is one form of letting go of that excess baggage that has built up through time. as they say in matters of who is the better sex, women tend to live longer and crying/showing emotions is one of the factors. men tend to hide their emotions which can build up and can cause problems in the future.

anyway, i hope you get my point. it's not that your dad is emotionless or something. look at him as if he's trying to be a strong person so you could have a "shoulder to cry on".

Yacoby

Nov 3 2006, 11:09 AM

I am sorry to hear that. I have 3 pet rats, and have had between 3 - 4 for quite a time. as the average rats lifetime is 2 - 3 years, I get a death of a rat on average every 1 year, which isn't very good.

QUOTE

So the only way is to realize that and make sure you do not get fully attached to stuff around you (i mean everything: dad, mum, cat, computer, car, your body,...). If you are not attached to stuff then there is nothing to be lost and there is no suffer if you realize that all material things pass away one day. With "do not be attached" I do not mean not to feel compassion and joy when you are with somebody, I just think that you should always bare in mind that things are going to pass away one day so do not be fully attached to them.

In my opinion, that isn't very good, why shouldn't I get fully attached to my parents, I enjoy their company and friendship, and I know they will die at some point, but does that mean I should base my friendship around that fact. It sounds rather morbid.

randomdood

Nov 3 2006, 10:25 AM

sorry that happened, i was recently talking about how long my bird has (about 10 years..)
i'm sorry for your loss though, even though i'm not really a cat person i feel your pain.

Plenoptic

Nov 2 2006, 10:23 PM

I don't think it is ridiculous, just because the cat isn't a person doesn't mean you can't mourn for it. You had that cat a long time and I'm sure it grew to be a part of your life, something you could count on in a way. I'm sorry to hear that you lost it. I know it's been a few months but you can't really replace things like that whether animal or person. Maybe if you hadn't grown up with the cat, say maybe you had it a few months then it might not come so hard.

delivi

Nov 2 2006, 08:02 PM

I know how you feel friend I've also lost my only pets ever I had in my life 3 cats they all r brothers and showed great love especially to me. but now they r no more.

It's really difficult to lose someone who we love but it helps us to learn a universal truth that nothing in this world is everlasting

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