Jul 27, 2008
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Jul 27, 2008
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Hrm...I sorta have the problem...since I was like 9 or so, I've never had any friends for more than a couple years, because I move so much, so I don't know many people, and I'm pretty shy... Needless to say, it's really hard for me to get dates... I've never gone to a dance...not because I'm scared, or didn't have the ability to get a date, just that I'm not a dancer. I dunno if it's okay to go without a date, but I'd say try to get one just in case.  Can't help you on the college thing, since I'll be turning a senior in HS next year... I feel your pain though bro...I want this next year to be different as well...I don't want to be the lonely senior, you know? And there's this girl I go on dates with and such, but meh...I'm having trouble taking it any farther than that... =/ But meh...I'm gonna need to hook up with some friends like, speedystyle. But that's kinda hard, because I'm really shy unless I know the person, but BECAUSE I'm so shy, it's kinda tough to get to know and befriend people. So usually, I'm only friends with people because they talk to ME first. You know what I mean?
QUOTE God it cant be worse all the chicks in my school just seem like a bunch of snobbish *BLEEP*es QUOTE the girls in my school there nothing but a bunch of preppy skanks See now you're going to have to change that attitude for a start .... trust me when I tell you that these girls are probably going through just as much *#it as you are .... the pressures on girls your age are just awful. I'm old, very old .... but I can still remember what it was like being an adolecent girl and it was a nightmare .... however, believe me when I tell you that it's a temporary state and relationships in general can be much easier the older you get .... of course then you have different pressures on you, but that's another story. You have to give girls a chance, remember they're not the enemy .... so be open and friendly .... I know it's hard to develope inner confidence at your age, but the more at ease you are with yourself, the more attractive you are to the opposite sex .... the majority of women are more interested in a guys character that the way he looks .... you may scoff at this, but look around you .... how many of the adults that you know are living with stunning partners, not flippin' many I bet .... as you age, you become less shallow .... if we all waited around for the perfect "prince", we'd have died out as a species long ago .... I'm pretty sure that the "preppy skanks" of today, will be fine women of tomorrow .... we all grow up .... and school thankfully becomes a distant nightmare .... so drop the negativity, it'll get you nowwhere in life .... be patient and open to people .... develope your own inner confidence and you will be attractive to girls/women .... and never think of yourself as a "loser" .... youth is a precious commodity .... unfortunately we only seem to realise this when it's long gone .... enjoy it while you have it .... I wish you well!  QUOTE(zach101 @ Jul 6 2005, 02:24 PM) Ive never had a gf, and until the other day I thought that was fine but I went to a friend of my siters wedding. It was awesome I danced with some girls that were just awesome, sure they were 22, 19 and 21 but it was fun and I think they enjoyed it as well. I also felt I said the right things. They asked me what I was into I talked about my self for a bit but I dint hesitate to also talk about them as well, and I never let that awkard silence enter. That night was aweseome but the next day I sorta felt worse in a way I was happy I had a good time but in another aspect I looked at in the fact that its been two years and I still haven’t gone to a HS dance. And I started to wonder what ive been missing and that I should get a gf. I've wondered that too, I've never had a gf either, especially now a lot of my friends are in relationships, or at least have previously been in one. I'm definitely in the minority at this stage, which really does make one wonder - "Am I socially uncapable?". Honestly, though, I don't I am, and clearly you aren't (after you did socialise well with girls at the wedding), so it may be just a matter of waiting for the right one. QUOTE Any tips on making this school year different? Should I go to dances even though I really don’t like the girls in my school? And is it a really bad idea to go to a school dance with out a date? I guess I feel like a loser because after dancing with those chicks I feel like I DO have the skills to communicate with the opposite sex and its just the girls my age are mostly soo immature and never think farther than when the next time they can fix there make up is. Yes, it is bad to go to a school dance without a date, unless you have a definite group of friends who will go with you, and also don't have dates. I just had my formal (bit like a less hyped up Prom) several weeks ago, and it was terrible. First, my *friends* moved me off their table, as I was the odd one out once they all got partners (and at the beginning we were going solo  ). Then, I didn't even get to sit next to random chicks, but with someone who was complaining how he didn't want to sit at my table - geez, I mean it's not like I wanted to either . So unless you can plan otherwise, dances/functions need a date - just someone to talk to really, so your night isn't a waste/boring.I don't think you should feel like a loser though (especially if they are that bad), but you should try to get to know the girls your age better. I highly doubt all of them are as immature as you say. Perhaps you've been trying the wrong crowd? QUOTE(zach101 @ Jul 5 2005, 11:24 PM) Sup guys this year I will be a junior in HS and well I really want it to be different than the previous two years. You see I was home schooled through eighth grade. So most of my friends ive known for only two years, not that that isn’t long enough its just so many of my friends have gone to school with there gf’s since first grade. But mainly what it means is that my social skills arnt exactly up to par with the rest resulting that im sorta shy around girls. Ive never had a gf, and until the other day I thought that was fine but I went to a friend of my siters wedding. It was awesome I danced with some girls that were just awesome, sure they were 22, 19 and 21 but it was fun and I think they enjoyed it as well. I also felt I said the right things. They asked me what I was into I talked about my self for a bit but I dint hesitate to also talk about them as well, and I never let that awkard silence enter. That night was aweseome but the next day I sorta felt worse in a way I was happy I had a good time but in another aspect I looked at in the fact that its been two years and I still haven’t gone to a HS dance. And I started to wonder what ive been missing and that I should get a gf. But when I think about the girls in my school there nothing but a bunch of preppy skanks. I think I should wait and let life ride. Is college better? God it cant be worse all the chicks in my school just seem like a bunch of snobbish *BLEEP*es. Im getting my license next week so that should be nice. Any tips on making this school year different? Should I go to dances even though I really don’t like the girls in my school? And is it a really bad idea to go to a school dance with out a date? I guess I feel like a loser because after dancing with those chicks I feel like I DO have the skills to communicate with the opposite sex and its just the girls my age are mostly soo immature and never think farther than when the next time they can fix there make up is. Any advice/tips? Is it wrong to just blow girls off for a bit or will that just be hindering my verbal skills/ body language skills for college?  I'd highly suggest you don't just start dating because "everyone else is doing it," that's got to be one of the worst reasons to do something. Comparison is the enemy of contentment. Just be friends with people, don't get into serious relationships with people you don't even like, and until you know you can handle a simple friendship relationship with someone don't try to take it any farther than that. Once you try moving past a friendship relationship with anyone the possibilities of jealousies and commitments whether formalized or not enter the equation, and it may mess with your judgment. Just content yourself with being friends and if you really get along well with a girl as a friend then maybe you can consider it as dating. Just my thoughts.
Man, you surely need to start dating. You have to tell wemen what they like to hear from you, make compliments & stuff but don't exagerate, you must have style, you must know how to learn, have a nice parfume and stuff like this. And than... courage and everything will be ok.
Good luck! QUOTE(Milovoriel @ Jul 6 2005, 06:17 AM) See now you're going to have to change that attitude for a start .... trust me when I tell you that these girls are probably going through just as much *#it as you are .... the pressures on girls your age are just awful. I'm old, very old .... but I can still remember what it was like being an adolecent girl and it was a nightmare .... however, believe me when I tell you that it's a temporary state and relationships in general can be much easier the older you get .... of course then you have different pressures on you, but that's another story. You have to give girls a chance, remember they're not the enemy .... so be open and friendly .... I know it's hard to develope inner confidence at your age, but the more at ease you are with yourself, the more attractive you are to the opposite sex .... the majority of women are more interested in a guys character that the way he looks .... you may scoff at this, but look around you .... how many of the adults that you know are living with stunning partners, not flippin' many I bet .... as you age, you become less shallow .... if we all waited around for the perfect "prince", we'd have died out as a species long ago .... I'm pretty sure that the "preppy skanks" of today, will be fine women of tomorrow .... we all grow up .... and school thankfully becomes a distant nightmare .... so drop the negativity, it'll get you nowwhere in life .... be patient and open to people .... develope your own inner confidence and you will be attractive to girls/women .... and never think of yourself as a "loser" .... youth is a precious commodity .... unfortunately we only seem to realise this when it's long gone .... enjoy it while you have it .... I wish you well! I feel for him, my school has barely any selection. They are all either tomboys (which I hate) or punks (which none of them like me, not that I know of anyway) so, even though I'm a pretty cool guy, I pretty much can't stay local, so that's why I travel alot.
i think the best advice you could possibly get is to be yourself.if you know you're a dork be a dork,you're a pimp be a pimp but no sense in pretending to be someone you're not.
Well, here's what I can tell you...
First off, I may be the only current college student to reply to this thread so far, so you'll get a new viewpoint on your debate. I'm now a junior in college, and I remember those days back in highschool like it was yesterday, yet it's been so long. The thing that really gets me though is this, and I don't want to offend all of the highschoolers here because this won't apply to everyone, but I look at the kids in highschool today and I wonder, (Darn, was I that freakin' immature back then???). You ask if the girls will be different in college, and the answer is yes. But, in fact, you as well will be different, and you won't even notice it at first. Trust me, the highschool years are special times, and actually, I would do just about anything to go back in time and live the experience again for a day or two. That's just it though, a DAY OR TWO. The best years are ahead of you my friend. I don't think I got to my main point in replying to this. I think I should maybe make it just a little clearer for all of you - enjoy life. Take it one day at a time. Don't stress out about things so much. I had many friends who were girls, but I never had a girlfriend in high school. In fact, I never wanted a girlfriend in highschool. The only mature part about me back then was the fact that I realized that having a girl during those years was a waste of time and money, because in the end we all move on to college and whatnot, and from there you begin a new life. So I say to you now don't worry about getting a girl, don't worry about everyone else having one. Be yourself and things will turn for the better, and if not, everything changes when you go to college. Everyone is new and looking for a friend, and the girls realize their new long distance relationship isn't worth it, so BANG!, lots of women will be there for the taking...but for now develop a likeable personality and get some confidence, geez, girls don't want guys who call themselves a "loser", so delete that from your vocabulary. Cherish the moments you have at this point in your life. You're in the beginning stage of what I think are the best years of one's life. Live life, be what you want to be, do what you want to do, and enjoy the ride...
Well there are times when I feel like I'm still not over high school. I still feel insecure and even paranoid that I think people are talking about me. The most important thing I guess is to remember that THE WORLD DOESN'T REVOLVE AROUND YOU and that these people don't really think about you that much. They have problems of their own too and they have things that keep them busy.
About the dating bit, I'm a girl and I've been to school dances in high school but I didn't (still don't) get the boys that I want.  I doesn't help also that I can be ridiculously shy and timid at times and boys sometimes see me as ICY COLD and ALOOF. I hope things get better for you (for all of us, let's be optimistic). 
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LOL ur funnie
 erm... i would say that you need to be able to communicate with people your age NOW so you can be a whizz later on and something you need to do as well is to be nice to people in your school because you never know they may be the girls that would be in your college
Though I'm not even in High School yet (only a poor old 8th grader)... I do have a bit of experience. Usually out of all the preppy skanks there's a girl hidden in the crowd that nobody usually notices. It's better that you wait until the day that you actually feel that everything's so right with that person.
You should be having fun right now, all relaxed and things until the day comes, which, comes when it does. So I hope everything goes alright, =) Plus, I wonder what it's like to be homeschooled.
I don't think you should go to the dance alone. Its always good to bring a date or some friends with you that don't have dates. lol. Highschool is not everything. DOn't feel pressured to do something you don't want to do. But if you want to take a shot at it and see what happens. go for it. I"m not daring enough to do it alone. but maybe you can.may the force be with you. lol.
I'm not in highschool any more,but I think that everybody sometimes feel like a looser,girls and boys to.But we need to learn from our mistakes..I know that is hard to do,but we need to try, nobody is perfect and the biggest mistake of all is when you make an image of perfect girl or perfect boy,there is no such one..there are a different types of people,some guys are looking for an extra girls,long legs,nice body etc.,some girls are looking for macho guys,with a good car..but there are girls and boys who are different then the others..For example I'm not some extra chick,I'm a common girl and I like boys who have something else and not a muscular body..I agree with some people from here,the communication is the most important thing,and for those who is to shy to start a conversation think about that,that the other part is shy to and you are the one who must to make a move..nobody will be agressive with you if you aproached to him or her with a smile,and start a conversation..
I think,that everybodyon this world have someone who is like him/her or who will like our character..maybe you are not a nice guy or girl,but there are person who will look into your soul,but you must let him/her inside..I think everybody had an experience with evil persons,but that doesn't mean that we must to finish our social life,because we globalize everybody in one category.. The second thing,yes,the technology had his on influence on us..the internet gave us all the benefits of communication,but what kind of communication? We can't live our lives on the internet..or I'm wrong? We are different from the animals because we have a power to talk,be social..so let's use that power don't you think so? Enjoy every day of your life,because every day is bringing to us something or somebody special to our lives,we only have to recognize this things and persons. So,you don't have to shy and you talk a lot to other persons...and don't forget for everyone there is someone who will make you happy,just open your eyes and offcourse open your heart to..
LOL Ohmigosh you guys are so cute!
 It's really refreshing to see you guys talking about girls and dating problems in this way, because from a girl's perspective, it always seems that girls are the emotional ones who obsess about stuff, while guys are calm, cool, collected and always know what they're doing... Over recent years as I've interacted more and more with the opposite sex I've started to realise that the whole "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" theory is real rubbish. In fact it seems to me that we create barriers between ourselves exactly by feeling, "hey what the hell is he/she thinking? he/she is a million light years away from me... i just don't get men/women". I think that personally all of us feel like a loser sometimes. And while you guys are sitting at the table at your prom feeling shy and stupid cos you aren't getting up to dance or just in general not mixing much with girls in public, we're probably sitting at the next table thinking you're just too cool for words and probably think we're too uncool, and that's why you're not coming over to chat us up. To me, the bottom-line is being honest and being yourself. Even if you think that being yourself means being a loser and uncool and you're never going to get that hot chick/dude, pretending to be someone you're not is far worse and really goes nowhere in the long run. My guy mates often tell me they have problems knowing what a girl is thinking, and they respect me for being honest... and it's the same thing with girls... we spend half our time wondering what you're thinking, whether the reason you're not calling is because we had something stuck in our teeth (as opposed to you lost our number )So here's my advice... embrace your quirks, be who you are, like what you like, and talk to people... talk to as many as you can and sooner or later you'll find a couple who not only don't think you're a geek, but actually think you're really cool for being just the way you are
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Another mail I recieved... No assumptions please.. /tongue.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" Girls, post your advise for us guyz and Guyz, post your advise for u girls. Me (being male) have I'm very intered in finding out what sounds like a good date to girls. If you girls coulds have After years of my friends talking about their break ups here are some NO NO's I've found. okay, I'm wondering...what really turns girls on. I mean physically. Or is it not always that. I Okay girls got a question for all of you. Say you go to a bar/club with a guy. Do you want to hey, im 16 sonn to be 17, and the only thing missing in my life is a gf. Ive never really had one, Mkay, I know it is usually better if guys ask girls out, but like.. a lot.. girls have been asking I need help, I like a girl but she jut likes me as a freind we have similar interests and we are Ok well I like this girl at my school, shes soo cute and likes alot of the same stuff as I do. I There's this girl i like, its a long story, but here's how it went I saw this girl in the ok, i like this girl ,and her best friend likes me . I have told her friend nicely that I don't Okay for all you dating noobies, here are some tips to asking a girl out and stuff. 1. Don't Looking for feel, loser, girls, college
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 Ever Feel Like A Loser? - Are girls in college better? |
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