A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vise versa. "Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00." This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.

The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to themoon?" The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer.

Okay says the lawyer, your turn. She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?" The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.00. The blonde says, "Thank you," and turns back to get some more sleep.

The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, what's the answer? "Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.

 

 

 

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A blonde man,a hispanic man,and an Irish man are working on a construction site,and it's time for lunch. The blonde man opens up his lunch and finds PB&J and he says "Oh,God! If I have to eat another one of these,I swear I'll jump off this building and kill myself!!" The Hispanic man opens up his lunch and says "Eicharamba! If I have to eat another bean burrito,I swear I'll jump with you!!" The Irish man opens up his lunch and says "Oh! If I have to eat another chicken sandwich I swear I'll jump too!!"
So the next day,they all have the same things in their lunches, so they commit suicide by jumping off the building together. At their funerals,the wives of the Hispanic and Irish men say "Oh,if only they would have told us they wanted something different, we would've given it to them. "But the wife of the blonde man says "Don't look at me,he packed his own lunch."

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sorry for double posting

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house. The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand. Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. He goes over and asks her if she is OK. She replies yes. He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house. He then asks her why she has a ski jacket over her fur coat. She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and they said.... FOR BEST RESULTS, PUT ON TWO COATS.


One day three women went camping - a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. The blonde suddenly had to go to the bathroom. She went into the woods with her toilet paper and did her business. While she was gone, the brunette and the redhead decided to play a joke on her. They skinned a rabbit and snuck up on the blonde, put the guts behind her and ran back to the campsite. Three minutes later they heard a scream.
Then they waited another half an hour and the blonde came back, sweating. She said, "I had to poop so hard I pooped my guts out. But with the grace of God and these two fingers, I think I got them back in."

 

 

 

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lol, nice one guys.

Here is one i know of.
What do you do when a Blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

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A blonde is driving along a free way when she cuts in front of a truck driver, getting really annoyed the truck driver pulls her over, and draws a circle and says stand here and don't move the trucker goes to the blondes car and smashes all the windows, the blonde starts laughing.
"If you think thats funny wait till you see this!" And he slashes all the tires, and still the blonde is laughing, "This won't be funny!" and he sets the car on fire, and still the blonde is laughing hysterically. He says "what's so funny, I have done all this to your car!" "Why are you laughing?"

"While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle 5 times."






A blonde, a brunette and a readhead are stuck on an island. For years and years they live there, until one day they find a magic lamp. They rub and rub and sure enough out comes a genie. The genie says "since I can only give out 3 wishes, you may each have one."
The brunette goes first, "I have been stuck here for years, I miss my family and my husband and my life-- I just want to go home" ... POOF she is gone.
The the red head makes her wish "This place sucks, I want to go home too" ... POOF she is gone.
The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie says to her "My dear what is the matter, "I wish my friends were here" ... POOF!!!






Three girls are walking in a magical forest. Suddenly, a witch comes out of the woods, and tells them: "Each of you has to say one good thing about herself. If you lie, i will make you disappear!".
The first girl, a brunette, says: "I think I am a very kind and toughtfull person". *Pooph*- she disappears.
The second girl, red-haired, says: "I think i am very sexy". *Pooph*- she also disappears.
The third girl, a blonde, says: "Well, I think..." *Pooph*- she is gone...

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