"100 Reasons You'll Be Speechless" -microsoft - The most hilarious things I've ever read.

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"100 Reasons You'll Be Speechless" -microsoft - The most hilarious things I've ever read.

Amiel
Oh, I'm now thinking to totally upgrade and update my computer into Windows Vista and I should see the real features right away. Because before, I had the chance to try and test Microsoft Windows Vista Ultimate and I'm just catching it's new user inerface, it's Glass effect... aero?, and it's shiny taskbar. But now, when I saw Microsoft's 100 reasons, I'm now really thinking if should upgrade and update or what. Woo, Microsoft is really desperate now because they want to have more sales and more sales to have more income of course! And also because there are now some bad news about their new operating system which is Microsoft Windows Vista. And the reports are the Operating system is too buggy, full of errors, etc. Should I believe them or should I believe thhe reports that I've seen?

If it is buggy, it's really part of any OS and other programs. It's a big impression if it doesnt have bugs. I dont think Microsoft will not realease and will not sell Microsoft Windows Vista if it has full of errors, Mr. Bill Gates and Microsoft will be on shame if it has full of errors.

 

 

 


Reply

dre
It's way too early to use Vista yet, I'm pretty sure you can get everything you need on XP right now and for many years to come (I'm guessing you run XP though). It's a complete resource hog, and in my opinion, is part of a scam involving DirectX 10.
QUOTE
I dont think Microsoft will not realease and will not sell Microsoft Windows Vista if it has full of errors, Mr. Bill Gates and Microsoft will be on shame if it has full of errors.

Ever try things like Windows 98 or Windows ME? Those wonderful products used to only crashed about 4 times a day on my older pc, which definitely met the recommendations set by the OS.

Reply

tricky77puzzle
I'll try to review them 1 by 1. If the post is too long, I apologize.

While I review them, I'll keep a record of how many reasons are valid or plausible. If a reason is valid but nothing to really be speechless about, I'll count it as "plausible", or "half a reason".

1. It makes using the PC a breeze.

Define "breeze". You get about 40 interruptions a minute from UAC. (I know the problem exists on Linux too, but at least you only need to do it once!)

2. Because all of your music is just a remote control click away.

I never knew remote controls could be used on computers. Also, notice how they say "compatible" in the reason. I don't think 99% of non-universal remotes are compatible.

3. It's the safest version of Windows ever.

Define "safe". If "safe" means that Windows bugs you for every security risk 0.1% and higher that you take, then yes, it is very safe.

4. See your world in a whole new light.

Windows Aero is not "a whole new light". Why would we need to see behind our application window's titlebar?

5. It can find your stuff.

So can Google Desktop search. Sorry, Microsoft, you fail there.

6. Because you're always on the run.

From what? The police? The Sync center was present in Windows XP as well, and I think Linux and Mac have them too.

7. Because you can freeze time.

This is an overexaggerated claim. (Okay, how is "overexaggerate" not a word? Firefox's spell-check returns it as one.) Sure, the Photo gallery is useful, but nothing Adobe Photoshop Album Starter Edition couldn't handle.

8. Your PC can take care of itself

The diagnosing one is just a polished-up version of Dr. Watson. The self-tuning stuff, I've never experienced with my Vista. I'll have to check later on this. (+0.5 reason, because it's plausible)

9. Unchain your mobile PC

I thought the Network and Sharing center existed in Windows 98 as well. Microsoft must really be good at recycling.

10. Surf more Safely.

Internet Explorer 7 includes anti-phishing and malware checks. Although these might be useful, they're not as useful as professional security systems like Norton or CA. But, it might be useful for some people, so I'll count it as plausible. (+0.5 reason)

11. Help protect your kids online.

The parental controls pretty much control everything that they could want, as well as giving the parent access to what the child really has been doing. It's kind of like Big Brother, so I'd say the controls are pretty efficient. However, software could do this already, so it's no reason go get off your seats. (+0.5 reason)

12. Schedule showtime on your time

You know, I think Joost does this better. But since Windows has it anyway, I'll give something to them. (+0.5 reason)

13. Because you need to know who the bad guys are.

This is the anti-phishing feature in IE7. I thought Windows XP already supported this. Sorry Microsoft, no half-cookies here.

14. Make any room a Media room

This feature needs and Xbox 360, which costs about $1 for every degree it advertises (roughly $360). So you need to spend $760 to make every room a media room. The price tag alone makes me go "wow", and not in a good way.

15. Because your PC remembers to back up for you.

And it did as well with XP's System Restore. No reason for your eyes to pop out, folks.

Okay, I'll stop here for now, since I'm lazy and also want to get all the credits for the huge post I'm in the progress of making (I believe the maximum is 10). So far, Microsoft has 2 "reasons".

 

 

 


Reply

dre
QUOTE
10. Surf more Safely.

Internet Explorer 7
Internet Explorer and safety should never be used in the same sentence.

QUOTE
13. Because you need to know who the bad guys are.

Lol, who, the HaX0rz?

QUOTE
2. Because all of your music is just a remote control click away.

I never knew remote controls could be used on computers. Also, notice how they say "compatible" in the reason. I don't think 99% of non-universal remotes are compatible.
So apparently, a remote is required? Lol.

QUOTE
7. Because you can freeze time.

Exactly, the BSOD (or the equivalent) does that for you! How neat!

Reply

tricky77puzzle
Okay, now for 16 to 30:

16. Get your new computer up and running in no time.

I believe Linux has this sort of a feature too, as well as CA Desktop Migrator. And it's not exactly hard to migrate your entire desktop. You might actually benefit from not doing so, because your desktop is less clutterred.

17. It's like having your own personal anchorman.

Ever heard of Google Sidebar? Or how about Desktop Sidebar, which does the same thing for Windows XP?

18. Create your own personal archive.

This is just the back up feature 15 again. Of course, it has a schedule, but you could easily do that with XP or Linux.

19. Watch live TV on your PC

Well, this is an original reason, but there was software to do that already; it was just that people didn't know about it. It's not exactly a breathtaking reason... (+0.5 reason)

20. Set your home network up in a flash

I don't think there is a home network in 95% of homes that have computers...

OK, WTF. It doesn't display properly in Firefox or Opera.

21. Put more playtime in family time.

So now there's Chess, Mahjong, and Purble Place. Big whoop. Kids usually don't play those kinds of games anyway, unless they're over 8.

22. See everything you're working on at a glance.

Flip 3D might actually be a reason to be surprised at Vista. Maybe Microsoft does tell the truth sometimes after all. (+1 reason)
Of course, there's always the already-implemented virtual desktop system of Ubuntu, which has a "Rotate 3d" enabled if Beryl is on.

23. Because it's like a digital candy store.

Note the word "store". That means everything comes at a price. Ubuntu, on the other hand, is like a school party the size of Tutti Fruitti.

24. Because you don't want to worry about spyware.

This, at a glance, has nothing to do with Vista itself. Now, if it said "you don't have to worry about spyware", then it would have some correlation.
Of course, you always have to worry about spyware with any Windows product, regardless of how close it is to the HAL the Windows sets up.

25. It works with the software, hardware, and services you want.

Yeah, right. I don't even need to explain this one. About 85% of people who have Vista will know what I mean.
It also says, "just look for the 'Certified for Windows Vista' logo." Well, I've got some news for you, Microhard. About 25% of all products sold worldwide have these on them. Much less than the 51% you'd need for a pseudomonopoly...

26. Because you're a multitasker.

Am I? It doesn't seem like it. Windows XP is also a multitasking OS. Why can't we just use that?
As well, the Quick Tabs function in IE7 is also available in Firefox 2. Why can't we just use that?

27. Because your computer can keep up with you while you're on the go.

If you take your computer along with you, of course it'll keep up.

28. Enjoy your memories, larger than life.

Aren't all memories larger than life? Those big, beautiful photos don't have too much detail in them, do they...

29. Take the handwritten approach

Hmm. I seem to remember that Windows XP had a Tablet PC edition that was especially designed for this.

30. Restore your PC in an instant

Even Norton Ghost's backup takes about 1/5 of the total restored hard disk's space. I shudder to think what kind of algorithm Windows uses...

I'll post 31-45 tomorrow. This is tiring...

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