My%20situation%3B%20am%20I%20alone
A Sudden Long Term Relationship Breakup

My ex-boyfriend have were together for almost 4 years. It all started in Sep. 07. My ex and I went to Mexico for a vaction. While we were in vacation my ex's friend moved in to our new apartment. His friend tried to work things out with his own grilfriend that didn't work out and he just moved back in with us. Immediately I noticed my ex change. He started to try to make his friend more confortable and started to ignore the relationship. His friend did not pay a cent because he was only going to be there to get back on his feet. My ex started to neglect my feelings towards him putting me 2nd best and my feelings that his friend is a 25 year old male that needs to have his own place. My ex started acting just like his single friend was acting. He started looking at dating sites and just trying to hide things. When I caught him in a lie and caught him looking at dating sites and confronted him with it he just got really upset and said that I should just give him his privacy. The dating site thing was very disrespectful to me not just a woman but also his girlfriend at that time. My ex started to lie to me because his friend did the same thing with his girl. I talked to his mom & dad about the problems that we were having and asked advice. They both said "His friend needs to get out there. It's a relationship of two and three is a crowd."

A week before Christmas my ex broke up with me. After being under the same roof and not paying for anything, his friend then said "I make $40,000 a year. I can get any apartment I want with or without Chris (my ex)or his wages." At that time I wanted to just be friend with my ex but I couldn't do that with his friend around. I find that very surprising because if he makes that much then why did he even come back and stay that long. I tried to talk to my ex about this and how I felt used, neglected, disrespected, pushed away. He just said that his friend is like his brother and that he was going to help him no matter. I told him that his friend makes that much and that he should be a grown adult. That now that his friend saved up money on my expense he has the balls to say stuff like that. I know that I have made my share of mistakes but from every mistake I have made I also tried to fix them. Thursday before Christmas both my ex and his friend moved out. My ex took nearly everything; the bed, the couch, the kitchen table&chairs, pots&pans, cookware. I know those things I can purchase them again. My ex keeps on saying that he still wants to be friends. I know I can be his friend but I am still hurt from everything that happened.

Now that it's done and over I want to get advice on how to stop feeling like crap. My ex got me accustomed to so many things that I am trying to get re-accustomed to not having him there. The thing I miss the most is just talking...The truth talking. How did people in my situation get over this heart-break. I would of rather had my ex cheat on me than to feel that the almost 4 year relationship was messed up because of his guy friend. I know that my ex will never totally see what I am saying but I truly hope one day he will understand that he messed up a great relationship.

-A girl with a broken heart

Hey...this is probably a bit late considering its february but I somehow wondered back to this article and found this:

My advice is to let all your feelings out- shout at him if you must, just let them all go. You'll feel better afterwards- And after that you'll have to move on. It'l be hard but you'll have to start forgetting. It's been almost a year since I started this topic- and I can say that I did this and felt better. My life has greatly improved!

That sounds pretty harsh...But believe me you wouldn't had rather he'd cheated. You might think it's easier but really both scenarios deal with the same things, except one has used and hurt added onto the end...

Well I'll give you advice I'll probably become well known for saying: You have to let out everything you feel about it. Your ex may not understand, but you have to let all your feelings out and you have to tell them to his face- only then can you truly be rid of them enough to start moving on. As for the things you've become acustomed to...You learn to live without them again- It is hard, and it takes a long time for the memories to leave you, but trust me when I say that things will slowly get better. Rely heavily on your friends, friends help this process alot- don't make the mistake of completely withdrawing from everyone and everything, because talking to friends -really- helps with these feelings. I used to go to a good friends house almost every other weekend (after he got back from a year out) just to talk about...well...everything! It helps to get it out in the open and hear peoples opinions on things.

You probably have dreams of the past at this point- if you were wondering those go too. Just lift yourself up one step at a time and don't be afraid to take help.

Crying is good too- some people don't like to cry but it can really help relieve stress just to let it out.

want to make my relaionship atleast at talking terms
A Sudden Long Term Relationship Breakup

Hi all ,
I wanna take advice regarding my married life ...I m going through a very ugly face of life ...I have been married since 3 years ...My hus is abroad ...He have visited me only once in three years and that also he came just to attend his brothers wedding ...He said me that he loved me ...But when he was with me ...Then evrn he was paying attention just toward other women ...I told that I loved him ...And can not take that ...He never bothered to visit me again ...I just requested him again and again ...But he refused every time ...I felt being slapped all the time ...Now after such a long time .,...He never call me up ...And when ever I call him up .He jsut hangs up the phone ...Probably he don't want me anymore in his life ...I have been waiting since 3 years ...Have been very loyal to him ...But he pays attention towarrds his mum,,,,nieces ,,,nephews...I stand nowhere in his life ...He hardly supported me financially ...Please suggest me wat shud I do in such situation ...I m very confused...Shud I keep sitting and wait when he will come to India ...Or shud I start my life again

-reply by Ishdeep

Admin Reply
==================

I feel you should start a new life and stop waiting for your husband. Marriage is a commitment not some understanding.

married Life
A Sudden Long Term Relationship Breakup

Hi...I have been married since 4 years ...Living in India ...My husband is abroad...I loved him so mush since first day I have seen him ...And ih hav grown day by day ...Though I have not seen him since 2 and half years ...We have frquent fights on the phone ...Because he is under debt ...His mother ha already told him that he will not allow me to enter his house ...I have got my visa ...But now I m scared to go to my in-laws house ...As I have understood my husband hates me a lot ...He calls me up on daily basis...But hangs up the phone suudenly ...Some time it seems he loves me so much ...As he is under debt ...He want to join a company in whish he have to go on regular tours ...He will come afer 3-4 days every week ...But now I don't want to live even a single day without him ...But he got annoyed when I told him so . ...He is not ready even a single word ...Not ready to live with me ...On other hand he shows his love to me ...I m not able to understand wheter he loves me or not ...Wat do you say ...Does he love me?...Wat shud I do in this situation ...I don't want to loose my husband's love ...
Kindly giev me suggestion in detail ...

-reply by ishdeep