Ok then, let's start this off

Me, En, in online relationship. Me, En, on east coast of north america. Girlfriend, online, in Europe. Ocean big jump. Four hour time difference.

Anyway, I'm gonna stop typing like a moron now.
Anyway, yeah, I'm in an online relationship with a girl in Europe. Anyway...
We've been together for... Pfft, over a year now. Jesus XD

Anyway, just for a slight clarification of facts and because any little detail could be important here, I'm 16, she's 15. And no, I've never met her face to face. And yes, I'm taking this seriously, I definitely didn't just randomly wake up one morning and go "hey, let's find a girl across the ocean to date today =D"
I'd known her for like 6, 7 months before I asked her out, and had feelings for her for 4 or 5 of those months before I did too.

Anyway, hasn't been all -that- healthy of a relationship, sometimes completely miserable. I'm probably the last kinda person in the world to be in an online relationship... I have this mild case of paranoia and the lack of ability to control my subconcious... Kinda makes any little negative thought go boom and suddenly consume every feeling and thought in my body
But that's not what I'm posting to discuss XD

Well... Kinda...
Around, I dunno, June-ish, the relationship hit an all time low. Like, it got really bad for a few weeks there. Since then though, it's actually been going upwards. Other than little things, it's starting to go great, my paranoia is going down, problems are subsiding, it's getting, dare I say, good XD

Now, I've known since before I ever asked her out that the chances were gonna be smaaaall. I mean, the chances of any teenage relationship working out have got to be small, like... Below the 1% mark.
And the chance of any online relationship working out is likely even smaller than that.
So, y'know, the two of them together have got to go down well past 0.5, or 0.1% even
Yes, I like math a little too much, it's a fault.

Anyway, it's just been bothering me a bit lately, one of those things that just kinda tug at you.

What I wanna know is, in your opinion is it likely, or even possible in any tiny hope in hell of this working out? Like... Me getting to Europe, we not breaking up and generally doing the whole corny life together thing. I'm not asking for something perfect, just something that works and makes us happy, generally.

Oh
And try to include the whole money issue for moving to Europe, the whole education thing, the whole citizenship thing... you know, all those fun little things that are likely to get in the way :3

I've typed up that description twice in the last three days XD
It's starting to feel almost systematic describing my relationship.

EDIT: Oh wow XD Auto-censoreships... Gonna have to get used to this forum and... Start watching what I type

This post has been edited by EnRohbi: Aug 18 2006, 02:53 AM

Ok well it's great seeing others venture out into the world of cyber dating. I myself have asked out girls over the net after getting to know them of course, but one thing I always find with the relationships with these people is that becuase of the distance between us, I feel like I don't know what she may be doing behind my back, and becuase it's not face to face relationship, you cannot be absolutely sure what they are saying is absolutely 100 percent true, so I get very paranoid and become a real hassle.

After I had a few relationships over cyber space, I said enough and decided to stop it as it is no where near as good as a real face to face relationship.

Now if you really like this person and you want to keep it going, don't worry about going over straight away to visit them or even live with them, just try to take your relationship to the highest possible level you can without actually being there with other, such as web cams to chat, phones (Both of which I am guessing you have already done) so then you can find out that if you can survive a long time in your online relationship, than maybe one day once you feel comfortable with it all and you are both ready (and of course providing you got the money) go and visit, see if it is all that it is cracked up to be.

Well thats it from me, sorry if that didn't make sense.

dude, no offense to you but you need to get out and go and meet real girls. if you werent 16 i would have given it some possiblity but the fact you are so young makes this impossible.

personally i do not believe in cyber relationships. how can that exist compared to the real thing?

online relationships don't work. there needs to be physical contact and just typing or even talking on the phone is not enouhg. there are so many marriages nowadays that started from online dating and they think they know the person through years of chatting online but when they meet for real and live together the marriage fails.

it's simply because people were not meant to live that way. If the world changed and you could have an online marriage then it might work. but face to face will always be harder than just online.

I know real girls
I do have a little bit of a life, y'know.

Anyway
I know real life girls, I've liked real life girls, I've been in relationships with real life girls, and I've also turned down real life girls -for- the girl across the ocean. The fact is, that when it comes down to it, I'd rather be with the girl, who's across the ocean, than the girls here. I know physical contact is a big, big part of a relationship... But I didn't exactly make the conscious choice to have feelings for a girl across the ocean Just kinda happened.

I think it's possible, personally... As I mentioned in the original post... I know it would be a downright miracle for it to last... But I still think it's possible.



^Yeah, I know. I've gone through that, alot, alot XD
For the most part though, I can generally convince myself she's being truthfull. I mean, I do trust her, just a subconscious thing that takes the possibility of her lying and kinda... Escalating it past good points XD

Dude so you're 16 and asking about online relationships? You need to reconsider seeing who you can see before this.

People who are older and more desperate for having a relationship are usually the people we hear of, but in your case it's a little different.

Take things slow, you're right, it's pretty much a definite that this relationship won't work out, even if it does short term. You're young, so take advantage of it by looking for someone you can see on a daily basis.

I've thought of it and even tried it.
But as I said, when everything's all said and done, I'd rather be with the girl in England and not someone I see daily... I mean, it doesn't have anything at all to do with how far away they are.
S'just who I happened to have feelings for stronger than anyone near me.

And I'm in no way desperate for a relationship. Other than the fact there isn't even anyone near me that I have so much as a crush on, I don't wanna be in a relationship with someone unless I really have feelings for 'em.

Thanks for your opinions, though. I appreciate the honesty

Yes, love is a powerful thing, sometimes you cannot decide who you love, if you are happy with being with someone who you may not even see for a long time, even ever. If you think you want to be with this person, dont be persuaded by what anyone may say.