Hi Everyone,

I'm new here and need a bit of advice. Basically, I've been on a work placement for the past year and finished this Friday. Two new placement students started a couple of months ago. I really like one of them. We get on really well but I've never really let her know that I like her as more than a friend. Last night we all went out for my leaving do and I was planning to ask her out for a drink then. I didn't want to do it before as it could have got awkward. I was talking to her a lot but I got shy and didn't end up asking (yes stupid me).

Anyway, I've got to go into work on Monday to pick up my work clothes. We all got changed to go out at work and I had to leave them there. I still want to ask her but I'm wondering how to approach it. I've got her on Facebook but I don't have her phone number. I don't really want to ask over Facebook because I think it's a bit of a lame way to do it. This is my idea:

When I go in on Monday I'll just have a chat with everyone. I've got some of the people's numbers at work but not all of them so I will just get everyone's numbers to 'keep in touch'. Then I can give this girl a ring and ask her if she wants to go for a drink, movie etc with me. I think it's better to actually speak to her than just write a message on Facebook.

I know I should have asked her when we went out but there's nothing I can do about it anymore. Given the situation does this sound like the best idea? If not any advice on better ways to approach it?

As a football fan I will give you audible to that plan of yours, when asking for her number ASK HER OUT!! It is that easy due to the fact that you got the biggest open in talking to her (asking for her number) and all you have to do to finish the play (pull her aside somewhere private) and score the touchdown (ask her to a movie or something simple).

I know that would be ideal but it's a small, compact office. It's all in one room. I'm not going to get the opportunity to pull her somewhere private. I don't want to ask in front of everyone at the office because it could be embarrassing for her or put her under pressure. I know it sounds like I'm making excuses but it's an office full of women and I know from experience they would be gossiping about it non-stop. I don't really want to make her the subject of office gossip when she's got to work there every day. If I ask her in private and she tells the women at the office about it then fair enough it's her choice. But she might not want everyone in the office talking about it. I know myself I got quite annoyed by some of the gossiping that went on involving me when I was there. By doing it this way she can avoid it if she wants to.

Why don't you try to phone her, you know her phone number don't you? I think you should have one since you have been closed all this time. Go with her on a date, just the two of you alone and don't talk to much about your feeling for her. Just have a good time and make her laugh, make her like you before you "confess" ... Good luck

I'd go with what you suggested. I personally think you answered your own problem with your own solution. You may only hit problems if/when she talks to the people you have just finished working with, they may not say good things about you. I think if you move quickly, but thoughtfully, and she likes you, then you'll have no such problems at all.

An office is always going to have gossip. In one way it tests the relationship and pushes it to the limits, but in other ways it could just prevent a good working relationship from even starting. You no longer work there, so just presue her any other girl you'd like.

As a woman, I can advise you that its much better to be asked out in person. And also that you're not stupid for being too shy to ask, you're a normal human being who, like everyone else, is afraid of being rejected. So, My advice is to get her to go out with you, on regular outings just as FRIENDS first somewhere, like coffee, or ice cream, or even lunch, since you work together, (you get the point), instead of putting the "OMG I HOPE I CAN IMPRESS HER" pressure on yourself this soon.

By going on regular outings with her and befriending her FIRST, you will both be more comfortable in eachothers' presence and it will show her that you care enough about her to take the time needed to get to know her for who she is. Trust me, if you become her friend, she will tell you all the things she loves, like favorite foods, flowers, and all the things that you need to know to sweep her off her feet. And from there, you can take the info she gave you and do just that.

Get back to me on this, I'd love to help you get your girl:)
Blessings
-Archangel

This post has been edited by Archangel_Baw: Sep 10 2007, 01:10 PM